harry potter: commentator by our dancing days

[lucida]

FANDOM: Harry Potter
FIC LINK: here
AUTHOR LINK: our dancing days
RATING/WARNING(S): K+
WIP?/WORD COUNT: Complete | 1,900
MAIN CHARACTERS: Sirius Black and Minerva McGonagall

FIC SUMMARY: "Mr Black, this is supposed to be an unbiased, just commentary." // "If you wanted that, Minnie, you should have hired a Hufflepuff."

RECCER'S NOTES: A friend of mine recommended this to me and I finally read it this morning, giggling at my phone the entire time, then immediately reread it. This isn't one of those serious, character-driven fics, if that's your thing---but it's amazing if you're in the mood for something short and humorous. Basically, 7th year Sirius Black is the commentator for Hogwarts' Quidditch Cup. Here, have an excerpt:

"Welcome, students and Professors, to the final of the 1978 Quidditch World Cup! Or, you know, the Hogwarts' World Cup anyway. I'm your commentator, due to bad decision making, a bet between Slughorn and Minnie, and the fact that nobody else would even be paid to do this job. That's right, Gryffindorks, Slytherswines, Ravenwhores and Huffleduffs, I'm seriously back... it's Sirius Black!"

"Mr Black, please introduce the players. Or at least what Houses are playing!"

"Right you are, Minnie, right you are. In the red corner we have the GRYFFINDOR TEAM! Keep the applause comin', kids. And in the green corner, we have the SLYTHERIN TEAM! That's some expert booing, Gryffindor. Ravenclaw, your chants are getting more inspiring each match. Hufflepuff, raise those flags!"

"It is not appropriate to have billboards saying 'Slytherin Never Wins', Mr Black!"